This One Goes Out to STELLA...because I got a facebook message from her tonight that said "its weird how i'm obsessed i am with your blog. end of story." Yes, Stella. Quite frankly it is a little weird-but flattering, nonetheless. Keep reading. It's good to know that I am not writing to the air; that someone, besides my parents, likes to read my thoughts.
So I woke up at 8:10 this morning and left at 8:40, about twenty minutes later than my usual . It was the quickest I've gotten ready since the mornings when I would jump out of bed and head straight to class...except this time I actually had to go through a morning routine to look presentable at work. Oh, the luxuries of the "running look" in college. I got to work at 8:59 (I know, I CANNOT make this sleeping in thing a habit...again), just in time for the conference call I had forgotten about at 9:00. Brooks and Lisa took us through the extrapointpass.com website so that we would be able to add deals, events, logos, etc...on our own to the site. Another valuable lesson learned.
A large portion of the day was centered around the gifts committee meeting. If nothing else, we got to meet several more leatherheads. Everyone was receptive to ideas, and a lot of them had really great input. Really, lots of good opinions...but I think its hard to nail down gifts when you have 20 people's opinions to consider. Sarah and I have spent weeks narrowing down ideas, at the suggestion of Joe Max from Max Mpact, and coming up with a succinct agenda, but then Joe and Max show up with almost their entire store in tow to present at the meeting and Will just kind of shot from the hip as far as the meeting was concerned so it almost felt like our efforts were wasted time. Lessons learned. Also, as we were setting up for the meeting, Will randomly decided to ask me about the job I had taken before this one. Literally, we were walking down the hall, carrying boxes and bags of promotional products, and Will said, "So, I was just wondering. You said you had taken a job before you came up here. What was it?" I answered him, and just like that, the conversation was over. Hmm...I wondered why he never asked me when I first started here, but without questioning, I assumed the issue was irrelevant to him. I'm not quite sure why he was all of the sudden struck with curiosity.
Tonight, the plan was for me to cook dinner and then I would join Bobby during his weekly appointment at the Perpetual Adoration Chapel. Ann thought that timing would be a little cramped to get all of the above done, so Bobby and I ended up going out to eat at Hotel Charlotte, before heading to St. Gabe's for an hour of prayer. Bobby was right...the She Crab Soup was awesome. One of my Uncle's mentor's, Judge Potter, had a wife with an incredible vision to organize an event where someone would be praying in this chapel for 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. After Judge Potter's death, Mrs. Potter asked Bobby if he would be willing to fill Judge Potter's spot on Thursday nights from 8-9. How can you turn down the widow of a man you hold in such high esteem, who's asking you to do spend time with God in place of her husband? Anyways, Uncle Bobby has been raving about his time in the chapel ever since and so, although an hour is sort of an intimidating amount of time to sit silently in prayer, with other people around, I decided it would be good to go with him. In the hour I was sitting in the chapel, I realized that one of the places where Protestants may really be missing the mark, is this Adoration thing. Every person who entered the chapel- and I mean every person, including a crippled man who walked with a cain, a small boy who came in and sat by himself, and several men and women over the age of 60 or 70- all knealt on both knees, head towards the ground, for several moments in the presence of Christ. One older man literally touched his head to the floor. These are things I'm only used to seeing paired with more intense emotions or circumstances, and not just simply out of the utmost respect for God and I felt like such a fraud having walked in and taken my seat comfortably, and without any particular thought as to who I was there to offer up praise to.
I will be totally honest, I did not feel God's presence in the way that I was expecting to. However, I did get some solid time to just talk to god and throw out prayer requests that I didn't even know I had. Many of these prayers surprised me but one had been on my heart all day. I finally got around to putting up some pictures in my office, and one of them is of my parents sailing on my Dad's boat. Will Webb came into use my computer, saw the picture and asked about both the people and the boat. Apparently he was once an avid sailor...who knew? Anyways, without a breath or a thought I said, "that is my Dad's boat and I think it's the one thing in this world that gives him peace". Tonight I prayed over and over that my Dad would have a boat in his life, for the rest of his life. I know it does not seem right to pray for a material thing like that in a world like this, but that boat is not just a material object for my father. It is his passion. The boat is where he is completely in his element. It is the one place in this entire world where he actually wants to entertain people. In short, the boat makes him happy in a way that material things don't typically make people happy...and I think he deserves that feeling, forever.
On a separate note, I think my hour in prayer had a round about way of helping bring to the surface a lesson that I have been subconsciously teaching myself throughout my time in this internship. I started the job with the comfort that I knew this was certainly where I was supposed to be, but with the insecurities that come with the territory of essentially being someone's second pick. If i'm going to be honest, I started on my first day with a mission to identify my competition, or the hurdle I would have to jump in order to be successful at this job. What I am learning is that competition should be completely irrelevant to me in that particular sense. Instead, doing my job excellently, apart from any outside motivations, is the ultimate goal and helping others to succeed is part of that. I have been trying to put into words those thoughts since I started the internship, and very quickly stopped feeling a sense of competition in the office and yet still felt challenged and motivated in my work. Tonight, I figured it out...but I think it's one of those lessons you learn and relearn for the rest of your life.
No comments:
Post a Comment